Our Apartment is Ghost Friendly

 

(Casper – The Friendly Ghost)

Okay, I can’t take back what I posted the other night. I won’t, and you know I’m pretty honest with you. Eh, mofo–

So here’s the deal. We still got the ghost roaming our apartment—to be fair, I think he goes all over the building.

You should hear this place when no one’s screaming or the music isn’t blasting from one of the other pads. It was pretty creepy with all the weird noises.

Maybe it’s a blessing that our neighbors are AM/FM all-the-time.

As far as what happened with us possibly being spooked out of our apartment—

My lady friend(LF) cut that in the bud. You know how cool she is, and she sometimes just knows what’s right.

She sensed I wasn’t keen on the ghost, and she knows the pizza and Chinese delivery guys(aka num and nuts) are whacked.

So yesterday she comes out with, “How lucky are we that we have a ghost?”

I’m not gonna go into how num and nuts were all bug-eyed, and how long it took for them to understand that she was “okay with it” – or that it took about an hour for them to get up the courage to act normal.

Let me put it this way, num and nuts would race off a cliff if she told them to. I know that, and so do you. But since she seems okay with the ghost, they have no alternative. It’s how they’re wired.

You gotta see them now.

They are like looking into the corners of the room, at the ceiling and blinking and making believe that they’re seeing shit–like we have a dozen ghosts. They’re whacked.

I tell you though, it’s getting on my nerves a little. I would toss them out the window if it wasn’t for my LF.

Calm down!!! I’m joking, plus we have a fire escape. Ha! Ha!

But if I yell “BOO,” they’ll bounce off the ceiling.

Right now they’re watching an episode of Ghost Hunters that I saved on the DVR, which in the past they’d watch through their fingers.

Yet all of a sudden, they’re thinking they have something in common with those bastards, like they could crawl through a pitch black hole filled with spiders and ghost breath.

No way, no how!

In my arms is Scrappy D. He’s my dog and nobody else’s.

(Scrappy Doodles – Photo by Bald Punk)

I’m about to take him for a long walk. The sun is finally out in NYC after a month of rain. Hence, the rest of the world will get the sun when we’re done with it. That’ll be about two weeks of darkness for you guys. Sorry.

Okay, I figure I’m gonna strut my stuff along Broadway, listen to some meringue blasting on the streets of New York, and take in all the wanton glares from todas las chicas bonitas.

Hey, did you know that Broadway has been around since even before we were a Dutch Colony? It was originally the Wickquasgeck Trail, carved into the brush land of Manhattan by the Indians!!!

And where do you live?

You gotta see me and Scrappy on the street! You know I’m the king of the mofos. Me llamo EL SENOR! Y Scrappy’s EL PERRO GRANDE!

Eh, papi!

I told you how my LF does the impossible, by making me look even better. Well, Scrappy definitely helps me groove into my punk strut.

Look out ladies, here we come!

Your bud,

Baldie!

—

Here are all the posts in this series: Episode Eleven – June 2009 (The Ghost!)

Guess What We Have In Our Apartment???

We Are Ghost Watching!

I saw the GHOST Again!!!

Our Apartment is Ghost Friendly

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